Humans are verbal creatures—in relationships, we use our words to express our deepest emotions, desires, needs, and fantasies. It just doesn’t have the same effect—and that’s because hearing certain words or phrases can be a major turn-on. But while porn stars may have no qualms about uttering filthy phrases during sex, many of us regular folk tend to blush at the mere thought of saying such words out loud. As forced as it sounds when you read it, many of us love hearing dirty talk in the bedroom. We lose ourselves in the heat of passion and take on a persona that turns us on in the most naughty, unconventional ways. What is it about erotic communication that increases our sexual arousal?
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Feeling Truly Terrified? Start Your Dirty Talk Via Text
It can be a little uncomfortable at first, but there is such a sense of freedom that comes with allowing your dirty talk to flow freely. It truly does shift the entire dynamic of your sex life in such an easy and sustainable way. Start small, ramp up over time, and ask your partner (outside of your sexual play) if they have any preferences as to the words that you do or don’t use in your dirty talk repertoire. Whether you’re starting out with dirty talk for the first time ever, or you’re starting to have sex with a new partner and just want to slowly test the waters, the following phrases have you covered. Tell them you’d love to spice things up with a little dirty talk, but you’re feeling a little apprehension and shyness around doing so.
Still feeling unsure about talking dirty during sex? Here are 9 tips to get started
- “Fire for You” by Cannons is playing in the background.
- After all, nobody is perfect and every sexual encounter is unique.
- Or, try engaging in phone sex for added sexual pleasure.
- Join 20,000+ people and get regular relationship-improving wisdom straight to your email inbox by clicking here.
Post-sex is an excellent time to talk about what you both liked, what worked, and any issues that might have come up. Don’t throw out anything super vulgar unless tonally all signs point to that being a good idea, Block said, calling on personal experience to illustrate her point. Most of us arent best selling erotic literature authors, and come on, no one is expecting their partner to throw them lines that might as well be an excerpt in 50 Shades of Grey. Your phones create a barrier that will help you to feel much more comfortable approaching this, and you will always have a little extra time to really collect your thoughts to say exactly what you want to say. A majority of sensations derived from sex are those that are physical, pleasures provided to the whole body through the stimulation of our sex organs.
Love Languages
If you’re not together, take the opportunity to text her something very dirty. Not only will you make her feel horny while away from you, it’ll also increase the anticipation for a great time later. Do you ever feel like just having sex without saying anything to each other has started to get boring?
To learn more about the science of sex fantasies, check out my book Tell Me What You Want, now available in paperback. However, I fear there may be some confusion, so I’m going to emphasize the words ‘perfectly executed,’ because if you get all up in her ear and stutter like a blubbering idiot, it’s not going to be hot. Sex Ed for Grown-Ups is a series tackling everything you didn’t learn about sex in school — beyond the birds and the bees.
It can be difficult to vocalize during sex without sounding like a dang moron. In a tweet I will remember forever, a friend of mine described the most regrettable dirty talk he’d ever done, in which he actually told a woman “I’m going to fuck your stupid pussy.” I know! As a favor to sex havers everywhere, I’m going to lay out how to talk dirty in a way that will take sex with your partner to the next level. Dirty talk is a liberating experience for women to break down this mindset and become comfortable in their sexuality and desires. The brain is considered a more powerful sexual organ than even male and female genitalia because it’s where sex drive stems from.